She's a Bad Mother...

First, I want to say something off topic for a moment: 

What a sad day.

It's hard to remember for sure this many years later, but I think Ernie Banks was my first celebrity hero. And while that would have been because he was a great ballplayer at first, other things continued to make him someone I found amazing, and worthy of the word hero: specifically, his positivity - about everything, apparently - was a real inspiration.

Over the years, I've heard multiple people who knew him say that his public persona of always being upbeat and having a positive outlook wasn't an act - it was really who he was. I've always found that something to aspire to. Seeing him in an appearance at Wrigley or at some other event covered on TV always brightened my day. I'll really miss him.

Now that I've brought the mood down, let's raise it with something ridiculous. I don't know that there's a lot to blather on about regarding this record, titled "Save Your Tears Mom". First, it's Norm, and I love Norm. He's not always good (see the flip side), but there's a far better than average chance of hearing something I'll want to hear again if his name is on the label

And when the first words out of his mouth are:

Save your tears, mom

It was you who taught me to steal

You said it would be alright, 

Didn't you? 

...you can be certain that you're in for a fun two minutes and 48 seconds. And it does not disappoint.


Download: Norm Burns and the Five Stars - Save Your Tears Mom
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Of the flip side, "Dawn", I can think of nothing worthwhile to say whatsoever. Even Lew Tobin didn't want to claim a co-writer credit on this one.

Download: Norm Burns and the Five Stars - Dawn
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Tony Rogers Does His Homework

By now, almost everyone who planned on being in school for the winter semester has returned to school. So what better time for a light-hearted complaint about Homework?

As I wrote a few months ago, the Star-Crest label fascinates me. Although their products seem to have started appearing in the early 1960's (the only confirmed date for the label found in the AS/PMA website is 1961), virtually everything I've heard from the good folks at Star-Crest sounds like it was intended for release in the 1930's.

That causes even more of a disconnect than usual with label stalwart Tony Rogers' rendition of "Homework". The lyrics present a typical young man, perhaps in his late teens, complaining of how he won't be showing up on time for his date (where they'll "neck and talk"), because of all the work he's been assigned. When it turns out that he's too late to even go to her door at all (although he also stopped to "take a bath"), he decides to read a good book, only to realize he can't even do that, because, you guessed it, there's more homework to be done.

That actually would not a be a bad bit of storytelling for an early '60's novelty pop or teen idol rock and roll record, come to think of it. Gary "U.S." Bonds could have made that work.

Unfortunately, lyricist William E. Cobb sent his lyrics to Star-Crest, and not Sterling or Lee Hudson, and we end up with a backing, and vocal delivery, that sound straight out of 1933. I wish I could have been there when Mr. Cobb heard the results of the work he'd paid for. Still, for all it's ridiculousness, I pretty much love this record.

Download: Tony Rogers with Orchestra - Homework
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On the flip side, we hear Mary Marcuso's lament of having been tricked by an untrue lover, one who has now gone on to break yet another lover's heart. The setting again sounds like it was created in the mid-'30's (well, minus the guitar line, anyway) but at least this time, the lyrics and feel are appropriate to that time.

It's worth noting that this side of the record is a mere 84 seconds long: last week, I speculated that the total time of that week's 45 (3 minutes, 10 seconds) might be a record. Well, today's two-sider contains music that totals exactly... 3 minutes, 9 seconds!!!


Download: Tony Rogers with Orchestra - What a Fool I Was
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Starting the Year Right!

Happy New Year!!!

And what better way to kick off the new year than with some of the typical weirdness I've come to expect when I see the artist credit of "Phil Celia" on the old time Tin Pan Alley label.

The song title is enough to draw one in "A Fat Man in a Compact Car", and the song doesn't disappoint. Set to what at first sounds like a march beat, it's actually (to my ears) styled as a Lou Monte styled Italian novelty, although largely minus the ethnic accent. The words do the title justice, too, with the following couplet being perhaps the high point:

"If You're Obese

You Need Some Grease..."

The ending is a spectacular failure - clearly, Phil and the band have two different ideas of how the repetition of the final lines was supposed to work.

Download: Phil Celia - A Fat Man in a Compact Car
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On the flip side, we find one of the shortest song-poems I've ever heard or seen on a 45 RPM single (I think the magnificent Joe Stantan performance of "A Has-Been" may be shorter, but that was on an EP).

This song, on the other hand, is the only thing on this side of the record, and it runs 75 seconds (the entire 45, including both songs, runs three minutes, ten seconds - I bet that's a record!).

We've got the same 6/8 rhythm here, only in a higher key, and definitely a march beat in this case. The lyricist actually squeezed in quite a bit of information (and a moment of casual racism) into his brief creation. And the last three seconds are worth the price of admission!

Download: Phil Celia - Sharecropper's Share

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The Best Record I Bought in 2014

Okay, let me say right off the bat that I know it's possible, even likely, that many of you who read this site already have sound files of both sides of today's record. They were part of the song-poem website's downloads, and later were (and probably still are) in a WFMU blog post. 

But this is easily the best record I bought this year, and if I'm going to have a site largely dedicated to song-poems, I don't know how I can overlook having acquired this one. 

Both of those previous postings were also from a cassette copy provided to AS/PMA, and perhaps you'll find the song quality of the first song better here than in the previous recording (the flip side of my copy, alas, is beat to hell). The acetate also apparently left off the word "The" from the first song's title. 

If this is old news to you, well then, maybe consider me to have perhaps taken a week off for the holidays...

Quite simply, this record, "The Beatle Boys", is my choice for the best Rodd Keith record I've ever heard, or ever expect to hear. This is, to my ears, a perfect record. Certainly not technically perfect, but I've always found technical perfection boring. But this record and song are just "right" in just about every way that a song or record can be "right".

Regular readers of this site know that I'm quite partial to the Chamberlin sound, and it's never been used more effectively than here. Right off the bat, the transition from the chord at the nine second mark into it's 7th chord, with that gorgeous little (organ setting) treble figure played over... well, it's only four seconds, but from the first time I heard this record over a decade ago, that just gives me chills. Masterful. The use in this section of what I think are sax settings is just as excellent.

And then, in the chorus he uses the ethereal, otherworldly "ooohs", to equally great effect, before returning to the earlier settings, continuing to add little keyboard fill ins in a most excellent fashion.

The lyrics are funny and sad at the same time, and aside from the weird decision to use the word "mandolins" (perhaps it flowed better than "guitars"), I can absolutely hear this as the real lament of guy whose girl has gone Beatle-crazy. The last line, while I'm sure not original in the mid-'60's, is still really funny. The melody is as indelible as any I can think of - it runs through my mind all the time. The melody in the verse in particular resonates with me about as much as a tune is capable of doing.

And then there's the vocal. Rodd was clearly able to perform lyrics which sounded like he meant every word; to become the voice of the person who wrote the song. There are countless examples. I don't believe any of those other records match the ache, longing and frustration I hear in his voice here (and on a sadly comic song, yet!). The inflection on such lines as "I don't get a chance", "I would shine my shoes, buy a shirt and a cane", "They will sing of love", and several other spots is enough to give me more chills. A vocal performance for the ages.

While perhaps not my favorite song-poem record of all (today, that is perhaps "Darling, Don't Put Your Hands On Me"), it is easily my favorite Rodd Keith record , and even on a day when I am the least interested in it, it would still rank in my top five song-poems. Every moment of it works perfectly on every level. In my imaginary version of the land of media, this would be a record that was well known and treasured by the millions who listen to oldies radio.

Download: Rod Rogers and the Swinging Strings - The Beatle Boys
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The flip side, "It's Shindig", is certainly no slouch, either. The lyrics are a lot of fun, and there are again a lot of cool things happening in the instrumental track. On the other hand, Rodd seems to have had fairly consistent trouble - on multiple records - staying with this particular backing beat, a go-go beat drum pattern which for some reason hits the turnaround every FIVE measures.

Sometimes that disconnect between that beat and the rest of the song adds to the otherworldliness of an already weird record - that's the case with my second favorite Rodd Keith performance, "The Watusi Whing-Ding Girl" - but here, on a straightforward song with some good, but normal lyrics, I find it a real distraction.

On the other hand, there are some lovely and cool moments here. I enjoy the minimalist solo (especially if I can ignore that the drumming by that point is in another song). But my favorite by far is the little melodic turn (and the vocal that contains it) from 0:27 to 0:32 - five seconds of vocal and tuneful bliss.

Download: Rod Rogers and the Swinging Strings - It's Shindig
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I hope you and yours had a wonderful holiday season, and that your 2015 is even better! Here's this year holiday greeting card from my family to you: 

No Substitute for Jesus!

For the night before Christmas, here's our old pal Mike Thomas, singing a very direct verse about Jesus. Yes, a verse. This song consists of an introduction, a verse sung by Mike for 30 seconds, an instrumental section which I don't really hear as containing a "solo" per se (just a series of guitar arpeggios), followed by the same verse again.

My favorite part of this record is without doubt the totally out of place and poorly performed bluesy ending.

Download: Mike Thomas - Jesus
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As is often the case, I've buried the lead here by featuring the topical song first. The real interest here is on the flip side, "My Substitute". This is a gem of a peppy number, but rather than be specific, I'll just say that the item being used as a substitute does not disappoint, nor does the truly unexpected style of the solo section.. 

Download: Mike Thomas - My Substitute
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MERRY CHRISTMAS, HAPPY HOLIDAYS AND EVERYTHING ELSE THAT'S MERRY TO YOU AND YOURS!!!

Christmas Moon

Howdy, Folks!

Well, with five days to go, if you're half as busy as I've been (and continue to be, you can hopefully understand why I'm spinning today's ditties with a minimum of wordage. Today, from the tiny Advance Records song-poem label, we have the previously unknown (and awkwardly named) Bob Lobdell, along with th Don Eagle Trio (that's what it says, "th"), with the somewhat less-than scintillating yuletide number, "Christmas Moon". The surface clicks at around 0:45 of this record appear to be from an imperfection in the vinyl itself - I can't make it better...

The flip side of this Advance release clearly comes from Lee Hudson's song-poem emporium, but that's clearly not the case for this side of the record - I'm not sure I have a handle on which company might have produced this record - my best bet is Tin Pan Alley, but I'd welcome other ideas.

Download: Bob Lobdell, Th Don Eagle Trio - Christmas Moon
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On the flip side, it's the always welcome Cara Stewart, as usual with Lee Hudson, on the non-Christmas number "Someone to Love". Nothing special here, but I could listen to her every day.

Download: Cara Stewart, Lee Hudson Orchestra - Someone to Love
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Christmas Downer

Today, of course, we have another Christmas related song. In this case, it's Gene Marshall with "Raindrops on the Rooftops". But the only thing I found myself thinking while listening to this track was "what was the writer's intention in putting together this lyric?" Because the song is all about how Santa can't go to areas where it's raining and there's no snow. 

Presumably the song wasn't intended for those who are past the Santa age, or who were never there to begin with. I would think most songs about Santa's visit (aside from winking ones like "I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus", and a few I can think of with very adult themes), are directed straight at those who are actually (and anxiously) awaiting his arrival with parcels of toys. 

So, again, why write a song presenting the very real possibility of rain on Christmas Eve, and which states directly that, in that case, Santa simply won't arrive. To play it for the kiddies? And if you do, what if it's raining that night? 

I'm happy to hear a good Christmas novelty track, especially if it's from around a different bend than usual, but this one is built on a weird premise that I can't imagine working at all on its presumed target audience. 

On the other hand, Gene sounds great!

Download: Gene Marshall - Raindrops on the Rooftop
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The flip side, "My Time", also sung by Gene Marshall, is about as resolutely average a Preview 45 of the era that you're likely to hear. It's interchangeable, musically, with dozens of other releases. And the lyrics are about that song-poem standard, the good old days (and how bad things are getting today. Specifically, this is about the movement of time, and just how amazingly good things used to be (referring to some point in history where there was only peace and brotherhood - not sure when that was).

Download: Gene Marshall - My Time
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Christmas is Coming! What if Jesus Comes, Too?

By now, some of the more perceptive of you may have picked up on a few subtle hints that Christmas is coming. While the Episcopalian in me wants to point out that this is not actually the Christmas season; that season actually begins on December 25th and runs to January 5th (hence, the 12 days of Christmas...). But that's a battle long lost to Burl Ives, Bing Crosby and Thurl Ravenscroft. And if you have to lose to three people, those aren't bad people to lose to.

So I'll chime right in for the next three weeks and offer up some Christmas related song-poems.

But one thing I do know is that the first Sunday of Advent, in whose week we are still in at this moment (depending on where and when you're reading this) has as part of its focus the preparation for Jesus' second coming. And that's where Bobbi Blake and the folks over at MSR come into the picture. Please excuse the shoddy condition of this 45, which has either been much loved or sadly neglected before it made its way to me, and join with song-poet Billie N. Yates in her wondering about how things would be "Should Jesus Come Today".

Download: Bobbi Blake - Should Jesus Come Today
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On the flip side is a little White Gospel, MSR style, with Bobbi Blake again offering up the vocal on "One Day at a Time", another offering from Ms. Yates. For this listener, at least, this song does not replace the John Lennon classic of the same name (one of my favorite JL solo tracks), in my brain.


Download: Bobbi Blake - One Day at a Time
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Narratus Interruptus

First: Happy Belated Thanksgiving!!!!

On to today's record. I find this one very curious and fairly fascinating. On the surface, it's another tossed-off sounding Mike Thomas number, with the unwieldy title of "Early One Morn at a Quarter to Ten", but upon listening to its lyrics, it sounds to me as if half the story is missing - almost as if the second page of the lyricist's submission got lost on its way to becoming a song.

Because the first 104 seconds of the story (all we have here) set up the situation: the singer's buddy quit his job five years ago, and that friend tells his reasons, most of which have to working his tail off, only have the government take their allotted share.

And that's it. First, I'm dubious that the lyricist wouldn't have known his "friend" had stopped working for five years (it seems to be offered as a surprising bit of news), but more importantly, where is the punchline? The rest of the story? The explanation of what the friend has been doing instead for five years? What happened to the house?

Maybe there's a part two somewhere?

Download: Mike Thomas - Early One Morn at a Quarter to Ten
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On the flip side is a genuinely sweet set of words about the lyricist's son, titled "See Him". I'm not crazy about the setting that the TPA folks attached to this lyric, and I don't think Mike Thomas was anywhere near up to the task of meeting the emotional level of these words, but they don't really ruin it, either, and the results are fairly affecting, despite the flaws.

Download: Mike Thomas - See Him
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Halmark Before Halmark, Part Two

Here, as the promised follow-up to last Sunday's post, are the other two Chapel Recording Company acetates. You can read more information about these records, and see a truly amazing scam letter that came with one of them here.

The third acetate contains a song called "Hold His Promises to Your Heart". This has considerably better sound on the vocal than did the first two records I shared on Sunday, and the backing track (one I'm not absolutely sure I've heard before) is very clear, compared with the sound of many later Halmark releases.

Download: No Artist Named (Chapel Recording Company) - Hold His Promises to Your Heart
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Finally, there is "Fallow Ground". This one is built on one of my favorite Halmark backing tracks (again, sounding nice and clean here) - a big booming, bombastic opening that gives way to what passes for a soulful arrangement in the Halmark universe. They didn't use this track as often as many of their other records, but I'm always glad to here it. And again, the megaphone from Sunday's tracks seems to have been retired for this track, as well.

Download: No Artist Named (Chapel Recording Company) - Fallow Ground
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Halmark Before Halmark, Part One

Several months ago, I bought a batch of song-poem and related items, all of which have song-poet Enza Cooper as the common thread. These items contained four ten-inch Acetates, which, being a different size than most of the records I buy, ended up in a different spot than virtually everything in my collection, and sat, sort of forgotten, for nearly a year. They are all one sided, and came in record sleeves with the name of the songs on each of them.

I came across them while looking for something else, and they are a revelation. While these four records have long been documented on the AS/PMA website, I don't believe they've ever been shared on line or among collectors.

These four records make up more than half of the documented (on AS/PMA) records on the Chapel Recording Company, one of Ted Rosen's song-poem mills before he settled on the Halmark (AKA Hallmark) label in the late 1960's.

What I find most fascinating about these records is that, already by this point, Rosen was employing the same backing tracks that were used ad nauseam during the Halmark years. And while these records suffer the higher level of noise often heard on acetates, it strikes me that the backing tracks actually sound a little cleaner and clearer than on many Halmark releases. Perhaps he hadn't worn out those tapes at this point, and by 1975, had worn them out enough that they were in poorer condition?

On the other hand, what is with the vocals on these records? They sound like they're being sung through a megaphone, particularly in the second track featured.

First up is the clunky-titled "Please Stuff This Envelope (With Kisses)", with a backing track that any Halmark fan will recognize immediately.


Download: No Artist Named (Chapel Recording Company) - Please Stuff This Envelope (With Kisses)
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Even more familiar will be the backing track to "Tell me of His Love", with the aforementioned vocal which sounds like it was recorded over a phone receiver. See below the label scan for a fun postscript.

Download: No Artist Named (Chapel Recording Company) - Tell Me of His Love
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Along with these records came the following letter, sent to the song-poet, from Ted Rosen himself. This letter is quoted in its entirety at the AS/PMA website, but it's fun to see it, anyway. The person I bought these records from called this a "nice" letter, but in reality it's another play for more $$ from the song-poet. He claims to have added, at his own expense, a chorus of ten singers to her recording session. It's up to her to pay the extra $29.50, of course, but he did spring for them.

Only he didn't. The singers were already there, along with the rest of the track that he'd be using over and over again, for full profit and no further cost, for God knows how many more years.

Part two, featuring the other two records, will follow in a few days.

Sleazy Gene

Is there any question about whether Gene Marshall could rise to just about any occasion, and deliver a vocal which matched the subject matter just about perfectly?

Today's lyric, the very directly titled "Girl, What Are You Saving it For?", required a bit of sleaze, particularly on that very title line, and Gene delivers. I must say, as well, that whoever wrote the music and directed the track did a good job of hitting something a bit darker than the typical Preview record, as well. If only they'd skipped those god-awful white-bread backup singers - they ruin the mood.

Do you suppose this song-poet presented his lovely lady with this record, in the hopes that it would be the final piece of the puzzle, in terms of him getting what she was saving?

Download: Gene Marshall - Girl, What Are You Saving it For?
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Upon hearing the opening moments of "Hey! Pretty Girl", one could be forgiven for thinking there's another sexual come-on in this lyric. But that opening guitar gives way to a more standard Preview track, with both the music and vocal sounding like dozens of other Preview discs from this period.

What stands out for me here, actually, is a rare flub from Gene Marshall, between 1:10 and 1:15, where the band modulates up a half-step and Gene holds on to the note he was singing, until well after the chord change is complete. It sticks out both as a moment of bad sounding music and as a truly unusual event in a Gene Marshall performance.

Download: Gene Marshall - Hey! Pretty Girl
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