After I began writing today's post, I discovered that one of the two songs was actually not only part of the original AS/PMA site's downloadable songs, but that the same song was also recently featured on Darryl Bullock's magnificent "The World's Worst Records" blog. Usually I check for such things, but it slipped my mind, and now it's too late to start on another pair of songs for the week. That said, the flip side of the record has its own joys to discover, so I'll feature that one first:
Today, we have some wishful thinking on the part of the song-poet in "I'll Never Stop Livin", a claim that seems unlikely at least. I have to wonder if the writer asked for a Calypso flavored track, and if so, if he was in the least satisfied by this emotionless reading of the lyrics, played by a combo that doesn't exactly sound like they know or care what they're doing. Certainly they don't have any of the verve needed to make a Calypso performance work.
But the biggest attraction here - and I must make note it to the greatest degree possible - is one of the dumbest lyrics ever:
"I went to a party last night, where I met a girl that I met"
Meanwhile, is it snowy where you are? It's supposed to be like that here in Chicagoland, but we're missing it, and the same is true for much of the U.S. This has been a lousy winter for those of us who actually love winter, and I include myself in that number.
To make up for it - and as indicated, this one is probably already being shared out there - a snowy number, "Snow Man" by Bob Gerard. But first, a few words on incompetence:
Incompetence, thy name is Tin Pan Alley. By the 1960's, this one time semi-legit semi-song-poem doo-wop label had made the full transition to the cheapest of cheap song-poem factories.
Listen no further than todays 1 minute, 35 second offering, in which not even three musicians (okay, maybe there are four of them) and a singer can figure out how to play the same song at the same time. Much of the credit, or blame, must go to the bass player, who seemingly only knows how to play a single three note pattern, and has no idea how to tune his bass, or what song is being played.
Seriously, this is the worst bass playing I've ever heard on a song poem, reaching the level on that great vanity record, "O Sing to Me". But Bob Gerard, on lead vocal, doesn't exactly sound like he cares about what he's singing, and the whole group sounds like they were late for something and ready to get this record made: